15 September 2008

gordon ramsay's shirtless nightmares



why is every Kitchen Nightmares edited so that we're always "treated" to a shot of gordon without his shirt on? is this some kind of chef thing?

14 September 2008

on a scale from 1 to 10

i've got an HILARIOUS joke that i play when someone asks me to rank something on a scale from 1 to 10. it goes like this:

them: on a scale of 1 to 10, how [whatever it is]
me: is one or ten high?
them: ten.
me: five.

see how hilarious that is? my answer is the same regardless of the orientation of the scale. HILARIOUS!

except: the middle of 1 and 10 is 5.5, not 5. but that's not as funny. not nearly as funny. am i indeed better served by making the arithmetically inaccurate but funnier answer, or should i strive for accuracy in joke-making?

07 September 2008

a victory in comfortable and presentable shoes?

i bought two pairs of shoes yesterday, while out to replace my venerable and much-loved ecco walking shoes. first, i bought another pair of ecco's, more light-hiker-like than walking-shoe-like. so far, comfortable and i'm bullish on the longterm use.

i also ran across a pair of Simple Planetwalkers, which i'd never heard of. what I got can be seen here, and so far i'm quite impressed. it's rather difficult for me to find shoes that i can wear/walk-in all day long w/o suffering horrible foot pain. the aforementioned venerable ecco's are the 2nd best pair i've had in that regard. but these Planetwalkers are by far the most comfortable shoes i have that i can reasonably wear to a semi-fancy restaurant.

so i'm bullish on these, as well. and they're apparently quite eco-friendly. bamboo insoles! hurray!

03 September 2008

euphemisms


i'm engaging in a social experiment where i start off by saying, "i'm gonna go..." and finish with a non-sense phrase. so long as it isn't anything i would typically say, IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT THE PHRASE IS: everyone assumes i'm going to take a dump.

"i'm gonna go try on a new hat"

"i'm gonna go level the playing field"

"i'm gonna go update my resume"

"i'm gonna go change a light bulb"

"i'm gonna go think about the playoffs"